noblescent

a personal blog

بِسْــــــــــــــــــــــمِ اﷲِارَّحْمَنِ ارَّحِيم

Hey...how are you feeling after the senior project presentation? Honestly, I feel a little bad.
Uh oh. That's not a good sign.

Many people turn arrogant when things don't go their way. More so than when things do, apparently. We start to question why, we start to feel we don't deserve it and worse, we feel others don't deserve better.

When things don't go our way, turn our sights away from the game of blaming. It's only going to bring us down even more. Turn our sights away from all imperfection and focus on the perfection. Where can we find perfection?  Look up. Look high up to the sky. What do we see? Birds flying free from any distraction and boundaries. Clear blue sky. Beautiful leaves changing colors. Perfection. Jadi kenapa tanya kenapa bila kita sepatutnya tanya Siapa?! Siapa aku untuk mengharapkan kesempurnaan? Siapa yang menyempurnakan dan kepada Siapa aku harus dikembalikan segala urusan? You don't think you can do it all by yourself, do you? Astaghfirullah...



[And] who created seven heavens in layers. You do not see in the creation of the Most Merciful any inconsistency. So return [your] vision [to the sky]; do you see any breaks?
Then return [your] vision twice again. [Your] vision will return to you humbled while it is fatigued. (Al-Mulk 67:3-4) 

Maha SempurnaNya Engkau, aku terasa maha malu dengan existence aku. Macam-maacm kehendak yang aku minta, macam-macam harapan yang aku sandarkan...all towards sesuatu yang sama lemah dan sama daif dengan aku, if not even more so. A piece of technology.

Lumpuh aku dibuatnya laptop mati di tengah jalan, padahal Sang Pencipta dah ciptakan aku sempurna segala pancaindera. Kelakar. Since when did this piece of technology become part of you? What's incredible is that recently I said to myself "Ya Allah, my laptop is literally my nyawa at this point. I cannot afford to lose it. Aku tak boleh tinggalkan rumah tanpa laptopku. Sejak bila dan sampai bila hidup aku kena depend on this laptop? I don't know how to feel about it." I hate the fact that I have to depend on it. It could either be another means of dunia for akhirah or another chain of dunya imprisonment.

Syukur alhamdulillah nyawa yang ditarik tu rupa2nya patah hilang tumbuh berganti. It may occur at the worst time possible...but that's when we use our other primary-Allah-granted-senses to help us pull ourselves together during life shattering moments. Guna hati, akal, tangan, mata, mulut, telinga untuk terus melangkah. Aku takda masa dan dan ruang untuk biarkan hati lemas dalam kefuturan. Move on. What's past is past. Baru aku tahu, hitting rock bottom dari tebing belakang rumah lain sakitnya berbanding dari menara KLCC. Don't be high by the height you're at. Keep yourself grounded by reminding how lowly you actually really are. How realistically there's a force that make you fly likewise is there a force that can take you down.


Have We not made for him two eyes? 
(Mengapa manusia terpedaya dan bermegah-megah?) Tidakkah Kami telah menjadikan baginya: dua mata (untuk ia memerhatikan kekuasaan dan kekayaan Kami?) -


And a tongue and two lips? 
Dan lidah serta dua bibir (untuk ia menyempurnakan sebahagian besar dari hajat-hajatnya)?  (Al-Balad: 8-9) 

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