Last chapter in DeKalb & Chicago.

بِسْــــــــــــــــــــــمِ اﷲِارَّحْمَنِ ارَّحِيم

Cake by Aunty Noreen :)

And so it has been three weeks today since I've set foot in Malaysia Tanah Airku. Two questions that I was asked 1.) Were there any regrets? 2.) Betul ke diorang sayang kita?

Last Day

I was occupied much with errands to run here and there after the last day of school. Speaking of which, the whole week of finals was crazy. A couple friends and I stayed in the lab and worked away. Went home for an hour after fajr prayer and came back to the lab. Final critique was at 3:30pm.  In the afternoon, the printer ran out of toner. My mind was too numb to freak out that my dear Laura had to stop me from working an hour before the crit and remind me to start printing. With the printer being down, I had no plan B. She said "Come on...let's get you an A" and drove me to Copy Service (a printing shop) without me asking for her favor knowing she had her own stuff going on. That was very motivating. Without her (Allah's sent), Allahualam what would've happened to my project.

Throughout the Vis Comm. program, I've gone through so many backfires; software, printer and laptop breakdowns at the last minute. I anticipated it was going to happen. Technology and I have been in war since forever. Even Laura knows. And like everytime, only Allah can help.

"Love is All Around" Grad Day - 14 Dec 2014

To be honest with you, I wasn't sure what to expect on my grad day. But I knew for sure that it went by too quickly. Literally. An hour and a half or less. I didn't know how many guests were coming. I just gave away tickets. I did last minute shopping for grad attire, forgot to decorate my cap, didn't wear my Phi Theta Kappa Honors badge, didn't take any good photo in my gown, tassel and certificate cover, no jumping2 photo let alone throwing the cap, no going around campus or by the gateway of NIU to take photo even until the last day in DeKalb, no photo with big bro worthy of FB DP. Seriously. I even gave away my tassel along with my gown and cap. What's wrong with me? All that was planned three years ago went awry. Kalut sangat masa tu.

If I could go back in time, I would've gone back to the month of September and warned ayah to not ride his motorbike to work that day. Othwerwise they would've been able to come to our grad day as planned. I would've made the time to decorate my cap especially to make a statement, I would've made time for just big bro and I to walk around campus in our gown and get the perfect photo. I definitely wouldn't have thrown my tassel, in fact bought an additional NIU one. But then I asked myself, will they matter in a year's time from now?

Come to think of it, were the memories on that day less than perfect? Were they less that what I had imagined? Allah made them WAY BETTER although none of them went according to plan. Regardless, with all these "would've haves" put together, they still cannot diminish the fact that it was, if not THE best, one of the best days in my entire life. And I asked myself again, had all these "mishaps" not happened, the day wouldn't have turned out the way it did. My darling Prof. Raymond probably wouldn't have offered to be with me on that day had my parents been around. Had I taken my own sweet time to "record" my own sweet moments through photographs, I probably would've missed capturing these heartfelt meaningful moments with my own two eyes and with the significant people who actually matter.  Even in 10 years' time.

Qadr Allahhu wamaasha fa'al. Allah had decreed and what had happened, He had willed.

“If any adversity comes to you, do not say: ‘If I hadonly acted in such-and-such a way, it would have beensuch-and-such;’ but instead, say: ‘Allah has decreed (it)and what He willed, He has done,’ for verily, (the word) (if)opens the way for the work of Satan.” – Saheeh Muslim 

Special shukran for the day to; 

Ana - who skipped lunch with us and went home to make a delectable strawberry devil cake! 

Zairul, Faz, Aiman - photographers of the day.  

Kak Lis, Abg Jay, Daania, Daniel and Makcik (ibu Kak Lis) - bertolak selepas fajr dgn baby2 ni dari Devon, Chicago. Belanja lunch, kuih seri muka dan gift cards. 

Aunty Noreen - who demanded for the tickets and skipped teaching Sunday school (!!!). 

Aunty Wasilah dan Prof. Ezani - both NIU alumni from Malaysia attending a conference in Boston who so happened to be around during the time. Selepas bawa mereka jalan2 ke outlet dan hantar ke airport the day after, Prof Ezani gave a wise advice "Balik nanti sumbang kearah kesepakatan Malaysian. Be part of the solution, not the problem." 

Kak Malina - who initially cancelled her trip to DeKalb from Chicago because she had a meeting in Carbondale (6 hours away). She got home at 3am and decided to still come and bring along her family, belanja makan dan pelbagai lagi jasa2 yang hanya Allah boleh balas.  

Phylice - for being such a good sport, coming right after work + interviews and whatnot. 

Usamah, Aisyah, Aunty and Uncle - came all the way from Chicago to be with us. 

Prof. Raymond - You know what's funny? Last summer when I attended Ann and Shamil's graduation ceremony for post grad student, I saw Prof. Raymond accompanying her best Art History student after the cermony. Hugging and taking photos together etc. Terdetik kat hatiku, kakak ni mesti special. Jeles jugak masa tu walaupun aku tak rapat pun dgn prof tu. Today the same prof delayed her flight back home to France so that she could accompany me at the grad ceremony. She stopped me while I walked down the isle to give me a hug. Later in the evening, she and bushand held a grad party for me, big bro and our freiends. Her reason was so that her presnce could replace our parents' since they weren't able to make it. Maashallah, may Allah make all of our teachers and lecturers the same minded as hers towards the international students studying in Malaysia. 

So no, there were no regrets. If there were, I would probably would've loved and done more for these people. And inshallah without doubt mereka sayang kita. Honestly, I don't know how to react to people's kindness and sweet words. And seriously, hanya doa dan ingatan yang effortless tapi besar maknanya yang dapatku kirimkan :') I do not recall a single day when I felt homesick. These people had truly made me feel like at home. Chicago is where the heart is :) Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah alhamdulillah. 

Last day of school as an undergrad. Can't resist to take a photo because check out the sticker! :)

Avec les Vis Commies yang cool lagi mantap. Laura Lopez, Donna Wilcox, Emily Schaffer, Emily, Alyssa Laessig
and Nathan Dietz

With Jenny Sieracki. A 3rd year ex-Vis Comm who didn't make the program but still managed to get to the finish line :) So glad to have your company.

Grad devil's cake by Ana :) 

Palestanian rice dish sponsored by Sister Kim for the party :)

Aisyah's note for me and Ana.

The picture says it all :)

Lunch at the Medditerano. It was ajaib the fact that the were enough space for all of us despite the eventful weekend at NIU. 

At Prof. Catherine Raymond's and husband, Dr Alan Potkin

Birthday pecan pie at Kak Yana's.

Blueberry birthday cheesecake by Kak Ina. Yumm3.

Out for last dinner with out Indonesian friend, Kim Alifen. Bro. Labadi treated us the Huddle's special Hi5 chicken burger. So proud of him for his decision to make all halal menu ! May Allah bless and help your business prosper. Tak dapat merasa masjid baru, dapat rasa Hi5 halal burger pon jadi :) Sebelum ni hanya one dish - burger daging - yang halal kat restoran tu. 

My moves - Home, Brute & Paddy. Hehe. Allah buat teaser pulak! :D Subhanallah.

Ya Allah, I learn that when You grant my wish, I am happy. But when You don't, I should be happier because now I go with Your wish and plan instead. Truly what You have in store for me is better than what I could wish for myself.